Each Wednesday I randomly select a cover letter sent in by sports job seekers and critique the letter. If you want to know more about how Workshop Wednesday works or how to send in your cover letter, see this post.
I have left comments open, but I will only approve comments with respectful questions or comments.
Please note, names and companies have been changed to protect anonymity. This person is applying for a FT position with a charity associated with a professional sports league.
Dear Ms. [Smith],
I am writing to apply for a fellowship position with the [Foundation]. As a non-profit and sports industry professional committed to using sports as a vehicle for social change, I believe I can bring a unique skill set and energy to this position. As you will see on my resume, I have a long history of leading sports-based youth development programs and community outreach initiatives. I am eager to bring these skills to the [Foundation] and I am certain I can help strengthen the organization’s program development and advocacy efforts.
As the current Community Relations Intern for the [Professional Sports Team], I am focused on increasing opportunities for local youth to engage in the [sport] community. In conjunction with our corporate sponsors, I facilitate monthly [sport] clinics for children in underserved communities and oversee logistics for “[Program Name]” – our 12-week health and wellness program for elementary school students. Over the course of the 2012 [pro sport] season, I helped increase funding for the [Pro Team] Community Fund and provided over 2,000 deserving youth with free tickets to [a Pro Team game]. With this experience, I believe I am well prepared to help the [Foundation] continue growing the sport in underserved communities.
Through my work as a youth sports coach and as an intern with [major national sports organization] and [Univ athletic dept], I have learned to harness the power of sport to create meaningful change in my community. Whether it’s by providing a supportive environment for my team to play or by lobbying for equal access to playing fields, I am committed to creating safe and inclusive sports opportunities for individuals of all means, abilities, and backgrounds. I feel these values align closely with those of your organization and I am certain I can channel this passion into serving the needs of the [Foundation].
Please let me know if you require any references or additional information regarding my work history. I look forward to speaking with you.
Overall, I think this is a good cover letter. I don’t have to go through my usual discussion of showing and not telling. I think this person did a good job of pointing out experience that applies to the position.
I’d give this person an interview.
***UPDATE: This person did indeed get an interview… in fact, she got the job! She’s now with the US Soccer Foundation.
Ron BarryMarch 28, 2013
I’d interview this person, too. The writing skills demonstrated here are impressive. This is an excellent model for aspiring applicants.